There are so many days that give me mixed feelings. Sometimes I’m blindsided by things that happen but it’s always living in a constant state of stress and anxiety. I feel like I’m always on the edge. Always waiting for the next catastrophe. I’m lucky to have a way to express how I’m feeling and
I was thinking about how we manage to be there for each of our children when an addict takes up so much of our time, thoughts and actions. It makes me feel guilty sometimes that so much of my thoughts are about how we can help him without enabling, should we do this, should we
To me one of the biggest issues I have with my son is trust. He is just so good at weaving a story that he makes you want to believe him, sometimes even making you feel like you are crazy. He can twist anything around to suit his needs and make you feel guilty for
How and why is someone legally threatened with money or jail? Why is someone told by their probation officer that if they don’t come up with $950 they are going to jail? Why would you ever tell a recovering addict that they need to find money by 4pm or there will be a warrant issued?
Sometimes I feel as though I’m talking to a 2 year old. When I say no I cannot do that, I cannot help you with that, I’m not giving you money, I am so tired of been badgered and made to feel guilty. Why can’t he just understand that I am saying No? Now it
Time flies by. We all know that. We see it in each and everyday. We watch our children grow and it seems like only yesterday the were toddlers. Sometimes I wonder if there was something I could have done to prevent my son’s addiction. Was there a technique I should have used in my parenting?
I wish for one day to be stress free. I’d like to just be happy for 24 hours straight without someone throwing a wrench into it. I wish I knew how to get there. Maybe some yoga or meditation would help but I’d need a quiet space for that. There is no quiet space at
Every day brings new challenges, new joys and gives life new meanings. Today is a day I’d prefer not to hear my sons problems. You see even after 12 years he has still not paid his restitution from his felonies. He has been on probation for 12 years! He has been given more breaks then
The hardest thing I had to do was apply for a visitor pass at the county prison. I didn’t feel like I would make it through the day, but I did. And it wasn’t as bad the next time. Yes sadly there was a next time. But those 16 felonies were knocked down to just
*** It’s been 1 year and a half since I started writing this blog. So much has changed but so much has remained the same. My son has been in jail several times, He’s there right now and will miss the birth of his daughter this week. Instead of becoming more positive about his recovery