Gaslighting

Have you ever heard of Gaslighting? I hadn’t until yesterday when someone posted an instagram photo about it. Honestly I had no idea and guess what? It’s been done to me. I always knew something was wrong, I knew I didn’t imagine things and I knew what I said but I was told I was

repost – detaching with love by Fran Simone Phd

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/family-affair/201506/detaching-love-0 Like thousands before me who visited the Academia in Florence, Italy, I was astounded by the magnificence of Michelangelo’s statue of David. Yet, I was most taken with the artist’s statues of four Prisoners or Slaves, his “non-finito” (incomplete) works. The Prisoners consist of four nudes with only parts of their bodies, like the head or leg,

Defying Manipulation

The only time he calls is when he needs something from me. This morning I did not respond to his text message of “call me”. Why should I? It’s so frustrating. I would love if he called or texted and just said, “Hey Mom, just checking in, hope everything is ok, can I do anything

Definition of Relapse

This week we lost a close friend of the family. It wasn’t from an overdose or a car accident. It was from untreated and unknown stage 4 cancer. Our friend went into the hospital 2 weeks ago and found out how sick she was and she’s now gone. Life just isn’t fair sometimes. She was

Addiction and Stress on Others

Addiction hurts everyone, not just the addict. Addiction has far reaching affects on the people that are around the addict, the ones who love them and the ones who care for them or advocate for them. Having the constant stress takes it’s toll both mentally and physically. It is the constant worrying about your loved

I know what it feels like

I know how you feel because I feel the same things. I know the pain you’re feeling because I too feel the pain. I know what it’s like to see them walk out the door not knowing if you’ll ever see them again. I know the excitement that this will be the time he stays

Families & Addiction – Repost from Dr Steven Melemis

Repost – from Dr. Steven M. Melemis https://www.addictionsandrecovery.org/families-and-addiction.htm Help for Families With Addiction An addiction destroys families as much as it destroys individuals. Living with an addict is both heartbreaking and exhausting. Family members are torn between how to help the addict and how to avoid being sucked into the addict’s world. Here are some

Drug Use & Families

We can all use information from reputable sources to help us understand how addiction impacts families. Remember that you’re not alone. The following article from NCADD provides an overview and some helpful links. https://www.ncadd.org/family-friends/there-is-help/family-disease Addiction is a family disease that stresses the family to the breaking point, impacts the stability of the home, the family’s

Fighting the Labels and Stigma of Addiction

  I find myself talking about the bad things that happen because of my son’s addiction. I talk about lying, stealing, yelling, homelessness, selfishness and so much more but there is also the part of my son that is good. The part that loves his family, the part of him that wants to stay sober,

Simple Moments

We had a great night with both of our granddaughters. We took them to a local carnival. One is our son’s and the other is our daughter’s, both are expecting new little ones in September and October. These two are 3 + 2 years old. I get to spend alot of time with the 3

Our Son is in Recovery

Our son is in recovery, he has to my best estimate, 12 months clean. I know that he relapsed last June when my Father, his grandfather, passed away. He has made a lot of changes in this past year, some good and some not as good. He found out last June that he had a

Holidays can make me Sad

Did you ever get upset because there was an upcoming holiday and your son or daughter was going to be missing? Or maybe you have your whole family together and you insist that there’s a family photo taken? Did you ever think, what if this is the last time I can get this photo or

The Other Family part 2

Continuing from my last post, my son-in-law left that night but he wasn’t going to let go of our daughter without trying to completely destroy her. He began a smear campaign on social media. He portrayed himself as the victim just discarded like a piece of trash. Even his parents wouldn’t allow him to stay

Other Family Members Part 1

I know that I’ve been primarily writing about my son but there are other things that go on in my life as well. Just as everyone has multiple things going on all the time. Sometimes they overlap and sometimes they do not. As the Mother of three I am surrounded by three different life stories