Well Hello Today! Today is another day, a day we can start anew if we choose to do that. I am hoping and praying that we can start anew. I am still worried about my son but the few conversations that we have showed me he has the tools he needs to prevent or limit the effects of a relapse. If he knows what his triggers are and know what he should do about them but chooses not to do anything there is not a thing I can do.

I sent him this list. He picked 3 things off of it that he knows are his triggers, at least this time. When we texted about this and I mentions some steps to take his response was “yes Mom, you’re right”. I honestly do not get that response often. He knows his next steps. He knows what to do and who to reach out to for help. He has chosen to ignore these things.

https://www.choosingtherapy.com/relapse-prevention-plan/

If our son isn’t willing to use the tools he’s been given the hole will just get deeper. He currently has a warrant which could be resolved. He could change the future by changing the present. Instead he has decided to escape. The current escape is sitting at a casino losing everything he has. He is losing everything he has built in the past 2 years because he isn’t allowing himself to use the tools he’s been given. What can I do?

I can only be a spectator to a very sad story. I can’t change the story even though I want to. I am only able to show him love, show my grandchildren that there is someone who cares. I can give them a brief escape from their reality by spending time with them and hopefully giving them some joy. They need love and hugs. They don’t need screaming and fights between their parents. These children are the definition of innocent victims. Helping them is within my control. I can show them that there is a different normal then what they are experiencing.

I had my son and family living with us 2 years ago. It was during the COVID lockdown and it was for 11 months. We told them they had to move out, they had plenty of time to get on their feet. We have given them so much of our support but sadly it doesn’t seem to have had a lasting effect.

My personal conclusion is that I can only help the kids. I can only give emotional support and unwanted advise. Yep, I will continue to offer advice because I think or better yet I hope, that someday it will sink in.