Continuing from my last post, my son-in-law left that night but he wasn’t going to let go of our daughter without trying to completely destroy her. He began a smear campaign on social media. He portrayed himself as the victim just discarded like a piece of trash. Even his parents wouldn’t allow him to stay at their house so he broke into a family friends home and lived in their basement until he was discovered.

After a few weeks his mother convinced his father to let him come home and live there. They were packing their home to sell it and move to Virginia. They made the hour trip to our house to pick up the rest of his things and to see their granddaughter. My daughter sat and talked to them and told them all the things that had happened over the past 2 years. They were aghast. They couldn’t believe the stories he told about his childhood, also about being shot (which he wasn’t) and really were upset to learn of him stealing from his daughters tuition money and emptying her bank account. They also learned he had lost his license and had not been working for 4 months. They had no idea and were not at all pleased he had been driving their car.

They wanted to know if they could have their Granddaughter at their home a couple times before they moved to Virginia. My daughter said that as long as her father was not there it would not be a problem and if he was, then they needed to be there also. They had her 3 times before they moved  2 months later. But each time my daughter had to make the 1 hour drive each way to take her and then they would call and say they couldn’t drive her all the way home and we would need to meet them. Of course they knew we weren’t going to say no since she needed to come home.

Every time she came home she cried and said they yelled at her and she was hungry, the poor little girl was only 2 years old but she knew she wasn’t happy. She would wake up crying and screaming after visits, night terrors. It was heartbreaking to see her so distraught.

His Father told us he took him for a ride one day and pointed out a homeless person telling him that was going to be him when they moved to Virginia. His Aunt told us that he actually came home drunk and high one night and when his Father tried to calm him down he went after him and later he trashed the basement of the home they were trying to sell. They had him sent to a rehab for a week and tried to help him get a job. But never offered to take him with them when they moved. His aunt told us that she had hoped he’d change and was sad that we had to see the person they all knew he was. My daughter was shocked that not one person would have told her these things before she married him. I believe some of his actions were a direct result of how he was raised. I mean I would never take my son and show him a homeless person and say that would be him. First of all you are not aware of the circumstances that made that person homeless and I just find it offensive to use that comparison. His mother was very protective of him and covered up a lot of the things he did.

I watch my granddaughter on Fridays. Many Fridays he would call and say he was coming with the police to get his daughter. I would wake her up from her nap and out we’d go to friends or my parents. We spoke to the police and they knew what was going on but because he had lived at our house they wouldn’t be able to arrest him for coming there but if we were somewhere else it would be trespassing. Just another mind game he played.

One night the police came after a report of a possible missing person because he hadn’t spoken to his daughter in a few days. On social media he was joking about how it was going to be funny when they showed up, so he filed a false report. The police had no idea when they asked for her that she was 2 years old. They were not amused. My daughter talked to them and explained the situation. They told her if he calls they’ll have to stop but not to worry, it would just be an annoyance.

Our granddaughter began hanging up on him when he started to yell at my daughter. She told him he was mean to her mommy. Recently she asked him to play hide and seek, she took the phone and put it under her pillow and said ok Mommy lets go downstairs, leaving him and the phone behind. She’s only 3!

Anyway his parents moved, they found him a place to stay and paid his first 2 months rent, after that he was kicked out because he had lost his job. He moved from place to place rarely seeing his daughter. He finally had a job for more than a few weeks and was living with a friend and his family. He asked if he could have his daughter overnight. There were a few day visits and then my daughter agreed. After that weekend he has not seen her. That was August 2017. You see she got into my daughters car and wouldn’t speak, just stared. She barely spoke all the way home. She then started to say and do things that no 2 1/2 year old should be saying or doing. We talked to her doctor and counselors. They advised us that she needed to be evaluated. It seems as though something had happened to her. My daughter call Youth and Family Service in the county he was living in. They immediately came to our home and her work to make sure her daughter was living in proper conditions but never went to where her Father, my daughters estranged husband was living. They didn’t even meet with him until over a month later and then it was him stopping at the police station to talk at his convenience. They thought he was a great guy, he told them stories about his time in the military and getting shot and he told them that my daughter was manipulative and evil. He said they had a good laugh. Now I don’t know about you but I don’t think this is how things should go. It was sickening to me  to think of my poor little granddaughter and no one but us really even cared.

Then the stories began about how he was dying. He had a disease called Huttington’s that was slowly killing him. This was the reason for his erratic behavior. He had a tumor on his spine, which he even provided an image of on Instagram, courtesy of Google Images. He claimed to be in and our of the hospital for many treatments. He would never be able to see his daughter grown up because he would be dead from this disease within 10 years. None of this was true.

It is now June 2018 and he hasn’t seen her in almost a year. He finally did move with his parents in Virginia and saying he was going to kill himself. He continued his self destructive behavior. He continued to drink and take other substances, he totaled his mothers car. They kicked him out again.

In the Spring of this year he told my daughter he got a job on a fishing boat in Louisiana so that he could take care of his daughter. He has sent her 1 check in 18 months to help take care of his daughter. He has been served divorce papers three times and refuses to sign acknowledgement of receipt.

My daughter met someone new that treats her with respect and isn’t controlling. They met a year ago and she is now 5 months pregnant. They plan on moving in together this summer. He is a wonderful father figure to our granddaughter and loves her very much. I hope that their life continues to get better. Although I’ll miss having them here in our home, I’m excited to see her spread her wings and have a place to make her own.