I know we all wonder if we somehow did something to contribute to our child’s addiction. I know I think in my head, what could I have done differently? As a parent we feel as though raising our children into responsible adults is our job and the first thing that comes to mind is how did I fail them. Everyone says you didn’t fail them, that this was their choice to make and not ours. We can give them all the right tools but that doesn’t mean they will choose that path. So today as I was going through and responding to different posts on Facebook I came across a post that really hit home to me on this subject. Of course I have left out any names to protect people’s privacy but I think the message is too powerful to not share. I hope you can relate and breath a little easier after reading this. We all need to hear a message of hope once in a while.

“to …. And all other parents reading this… I am an ex-heroin addict. I was raised in a Christian home with two loving parents that are still together. I was a great kid until I hit puberty. Starting at 12 years old I began my wild crazy behavior. I was arrested 12 times as a juvenile for underage consumption to fighting to possession. Right after I turned 18 I went to prison for the first time. (Which didn’t help and probably made it worse) After that I kept acting out… Jail was a pretty normal place for me. At 25 I got my ex-gf pregnant and she had our son but at that point I had just started getting into pain killers and couldn’t stop even though I wanted to. He was born and luckily I ran out of money so I was sober and got to see and remember his birth. I continued on with my addiction and soon became addicted to heroin. When my son was 2 years old I was sent to prison for 2.5 years for prescription fraud and when I was sentenced I told the judge “thank you” because I finally got clean in prison and was ready to be a father. I am now 33 years old. Have been clean since 2012 and have a beautiful wife and a baby on the way. I own my own business, cars, & home. I am saying all of this because I always had a low self esteem and anxiety issues that I didn’t even understand what was wrong with me. I used drugs to be able to be social and act the way everyone wanted me to act. I have NEVER blamed my parents for what I did and sadly they did any and everything to help me but they couldn’t. I’m so sorry for what you all are going through and I REALLY hope I don’t have to go through what I put my parents through. I see alot of my self in my son and hope that I can guide him away from all of the pain I went through. Hang in there but know that a lot of the times it isn’t in your control. I hope your son gets the help he needs while he is there. Stay strong and God bless.”

Hope is real! We can see a light at the end of the tunnel. We all face these struggles every day and we need to try to except that it isn’t our fault. We only need to love them with boundaries to protect ourselves. Maybe someday we will hear those words from our loved one but until that day comes we need to know that we are not to blame. We are their anchor and we can hope that they return to us as whole, contributing members of our family and society.